MY Last Dance?

So this past weekend a cousin of mine was visiting and we did some out of the ordinary for us clubbing. Growing up we were both going out to the clubs.... just never together! We had a great time dancing on the same floor sort of together and dancing w/ other people. Kinda like a group of friends all dancing together. Then of course there's some moderately slow song comes on & this guy grabs me by the hand to dance w/ him. As I'm swaying w/ him I'm completely not thinking about him at all ( sorry if you're my stalker and are reading this). Instead I think about how they do those waltz type dances on "So You Think You Can Dance" or "Dancing with the Stars". How those dances look so romantic. I thought about some of my favorite slow songs to dance to. I'm so old school- I thought about the Temptations "I'm Glad There is You" and "Some Enchanted Evening". I remembered one particular evening where I tried to get my own husband to dance w/ me at home to that song. Here I am trying to be all romantical (lol) and you know, it felt just the same as dancing w/ this stranger.... no real feelings at all. Well, at least I know I tried to spark some sort of romantic feeling before the marriage ended.
Another thing... I love how couples do those turns & dips while they're dancing. I always wished I had a dance partner that could do stuff like that. Last year I asked a friend how mine how do men manage to dance & twirl a woman like that. He used me as an example and pointed out that I have to let go of the control... let the man lead. Sure enough when I stopped thinking about what I wanted to do and just moved along with whatever he wanted, there we were. Dancing & twirling around like I had always wanted to do. So all I had to do is let go & let the man lead. Now I have clearly identified my problem.... I haven't found a man that I trust enough to lead me where I want to go. No man on this earth anyway.